Right Where You Are

- Ralph Marston - The Daily Motivator

 

Start where you are, and do what you can. Make use of what you have, in the time available to you, and there's much you can get done.

 

Don't waste your time waiting for conditions to be perfect, for they will never be. Go ahead, with things as they are, and begin making real progress.

 

The place to aim is as high as you can imagine. Yet the place to start is right where you are.

 

Let go of any concerns about not having enough time, or money, resources or anything else. Focus instead on the great value and potential of what you do have and of what you can do right now.

 

See the real treasure that exists in your opportunity and ability to make good, effective use of this moment. Claim that treasure by going ahead and putting forth your very best effort.

 

Today is your day to achieve and to make your world a better place. Start where you are, and get yourself solidly on the way to wherever you wish to be.

 

Success advice: The "You"

Accept Responsibility.

 

You and you alone are responsible for your success. While you will have help in many instances, the bottom line is that you are responsible. You need to be surrounded by the right people, working with the right investors, going about meeting your success in the right way. It is you that will make the choices and therefore, your responsibility to make the right choices. In other words, your desire for success must always be greater that any obstacle that stands in your way.

What really turns women on

What really turns women on and more sex and relationship news

 

A round-up of all the sex and relationship news stories that should matter to you.

 

Eye tracking technology has officially confirmed what we knew all along! People look at the sexual body parts more and faces less when evaluating women's appearance.

 

The study was led by Sarah Gervais of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln in the US, and found that especially women with typical hour glass figures or larger breasts, narrower waists, and bigger hips frequently prompted such gazes.

 

The study is among the first to use eye-tracking technology to examine objectified glances by which men, especially in Western cultures, purportedly often 'ogle,' 'leer at' or 'check out' women.

 

Due to these objectifying gazes, American women develop social physique anxiety, and show decreased cognitive performance and self-silencing.

 

This is because this type of attention reduces them to mere instruments in which their bodies are taken as being representative of their whole being.

 

Previous research primarily used women's self-reported experiences of this phenomenon.

 

Gervais and her colleagues used the Eyelink II eye tracking system to examine how 29 women and 36 men from a large Midwestern University in the US reacted to digitally manipulated photographs of the same group of models with various body shapes.

 

The researchers found that participants focused more on women’s chests and waists and less on faces when they were asked to objectify the women by evaluating their appearance rather than their personality.

 

This effect was more pronounced for women with hourglass figures, idealised in Western cultures, and to a lesser degree by women with smaller breasts and bigger hips who fall outside of cultural ideals of beauty.

 

Compared to their female counterparts, the male participants distinguished between women with different body shapes regardless of whether they were focused on appearance or personality.

 

Women with high ideal bodies (i.e. hourglass figures) were generally regarded more positively than women with average or low ideal bodies -- interestingly enough, even by personality-focused men.

 

The study is published in Springer’s journal Sex Roles.

 

Importance of kissing revealed!

Kissing is very important in a relationship as it helps the bond grow stronger and also make you re-evaluate your relationship.

 

Kissing is connected to self-confidence as it has been revealed that guys who think they are good-looking kiss more and even men who have dated several women are known to like kissing more, the Huffington Post reported.

 

Women are said to value kissing more than men and how we kiss with a partner makes us assess our relationship.

 

Researchers have discovered that there is a specific scent we pick up when we are kissing which is believed to be related to a person’s DNA and women are most attracted to the scent of a man who has a genetic code most different from themselves.

 

A good kiss can speak a lot about your chemistry with your partner as a good kiss could also mean you will have healthy offspring.

 

Also, kissing is exclusive to humans, as almost no other animal can kiss.

 

Now, fertility test kit for men to calculate sperm count

A new device that calculates sperm count accurately has been launched by Boots.

 

The ‘SpermCheck Male Fertility Test’ which is claimed to be “as accurate as a lab test at identifying low/normal sperm count” with results in ten minutes is priced at 29.99 pounds, Metro.co.uk reported.

 

SpermCheck chief executive Ray Lopez said that this test can truly help couples suffering from infertility as the cost of attending a clinic for the same test is between 100-400 pounds.

 

The kit is believed to be 98 per cent accurate at confirming whether a man has 20 million sperm or more per milliliter.

 

However, it cannot determine how healthy the sperms are, which is crucial in determining if a man has any chance of having children naturally.

 

Mistakes women make that leave them single revealed!

There are certain mistakes that single women make without even realising it and simple changes in attitude and approach can take single ladies a long way in landing a date.

 

The head coach of the School of Attraction, Damien Diecke, has advised single women to give signals to indicate that they are interested instead of looking away when a man notices them, as most nice guys are not brave enough to approach women who don’t seem interested, News.com.au reported.

 

Diecke has suggested that women should know what they want in a relationship and screen potential suitor on the basis of that to avoid heartbreak later on.

 

The love guru has revealed that women should smile more as it makes them more attractive and indicates they are open and friendly.

 

According to the head coach, women need to establish what they want by the first or second date, and need to make their expectations clear.

 

He added that not replying to texts, phone calls promptly could send the wrong message to a guy as he may think that you aren’t that interested.

 

He also highlighted the importance of returning compliments as it shows that you are interested and like him for the little things that he does.

 

Diecke has advised women to fill awkward silences with eye contact instead of looking away as it is totally seductive and can make guys heart skip a beat.

 

Booze behind most couples failing to have sex on wedding night

A previous study had revealed that many newly married couples are unsuccessful when it comes to consummating their marriage on their first night.

 

And now, the Huffington Post has claimed that alcohol is the reason couples don’t have sex on their wedding night.

 

The publication interviewed three different married people, and all of them blamed booze for their lack of sex on their wedding night.

 

Two women claimed that they were completely drunk by the time their wedding festivities ended.

 

Another said that she slept alone on her wedding night her husband was too wasted.

 

Things that happen during sex while pregnant and after baby birth revealed

Having sex during pregnancy and beyond is one of those things that is trickier to prepare for.

 

Let’s face it, things change. Body parts go wonky; emotions go haywire -- and that’s all before sleep deprivation kicks in.

 

Dr Lauren Streicher, an associate professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Northwestern University and author of the forthcoming Love Sex Again said that a lot of couples have a lot of questions about sex, which doctors aren’t bringing it up, the Huffington Post reported.

 

Which is why Streicher and several other notables in the sexual health arena agreed to share a few of the very common things that happen during pregnant sex and sex after childbirth.

 

During the second trimester, many women experience a surge of hormones (including testosterone), which can significantly boost their sex drive, Rose Hartzell, a certified sex therapist with San Diego Sexual Medicine, said.

 

At the same time, it’s not uncommon for a woman’s partner to report being particularly turned on by her body -- namely, her growing breasts – Streicher said. And that could lead to an overall boost in couple-wide randiness, if you will.

 

Women’s breasts might leak during sex. Streicher said that it typically begins in the second trimester, adding that it can be difficult for a woman’s partner to adjust to the idea that her breasts are not simply there for sexual pleasure.

 

As pregnancy progresses and women’s bodies change, many once beloved sexual positions are no longer comfortable or even feasible.

 

A 2012 study that looked at mothers’ desire postpartum found that women tended to perform oral sex on their partners or masturbate before they were ready to have intercourse or receive oral sex themselves.

 

Indeed, roughly 40 per cent of women reported they masturbated within the first few weeks of having a baby.

 

By the end of the first three months, 85 per cent said they’d started having intercourse again, but Streicher said data suggests that many women don’t totally enjoy it right away.

 

Thus, the “you’re good to go after six weeks” advice that most doctors give to couples after a vaginal birth or C-section simply isn’t realistic or all that helpful, she said.

 

The number one thing women don’t expect is vaginal dryness, which may cause pain during sexual activity. The dryness results from a lack of estrogen, particularly among women who breastfeed.

 

A good lubricant can help, but if the dryness persists, Streicher suggests talking to your health care provider about your options.

 

Another change for which Streicher believes women are woefully unprepared is the incontinence that can occur after childbirth.

 

For many women, urine leakage (during sex or otherwise) does indeed go away on its own, usually within a matter of weeks or months, she said; for others, pelvic floor physical therapy may be necessary, or they might benefit from using an at-home kegel exerciser device.

 

Clean bed sheets top turn-on for women

A new survey has revealed that clean bed sheets are a big turn-on for women.

 

The poll, conducted by a British entertainment brand on 2,000 men and women, found that clean bed linens topped the list of things that get women in the mood for sex followed by losing weight, the Huffington Post reported.

 

Fresh lines ranked higher than a new hairdo and makeup, and even a hot bath on the list.

 

One in six married women don't let hubbies see them naked

A new survey suggests that one in six married women have not let their husband see them naked in over a year.

 

Researchers quizzed 1,902 women from across the UK, and asked the ones who were married when they last allowed their husband to see them nude.

 

16 per cent claimed that they had not undressed in front of their partners during the last 12 months or more, the Courier Mail reported.

 

Almost half said that this was because they felt insecure about their appearance, while a third blamed a dip in their sex drive.

 

Around 40 per cent said that their relationship had suffered as a result and 36 per cent admitted that their constant attempt to cover up had caused rows.

 

Sarah Bailey, from online pharmacist UKMedix.com which commissioned the poll, said that body confidence is a huge element of women’s sex life, and it seems a lack thereof is causing problems.

 

How to pick the perfect companion for a trip

Before embarking on a trip with a companion, you must screen your travel partner for certain traits in order to ensure your trip is fun-filled.

 

If you are a morning person, don’t invite someone who is, as they would expect you to do the same and it may lead to constant bickering, News.com.au reported.

 

According to Travelzoo.com.au, you must be sensitive to cultural differences when you travel, and make sure whoever accompanies you is, as well.

 

Travelling often means spending money, so travel with someone who has the same views on spending as you do, as this often determines the accommodation you stay in and the experiences you have on the trip.

 

As a travel buddy can make or break your holiday, make sure you travel with someone who is as excited about the trip as you are.

 

Travel with someone who is spontaneous and you will be sure to enjoy experiences you never would have dreamed of.

 

Also, make sure you travel with someone who is as adventurous as you are as you may feel pressured otherwise.

 

Why losing weight can ruin your love life

When one partner in a romantic relationship loses weight, it may not have a positive effect on the relationship, a new study has suggested.

 

According to the study from North Carolina State University and the University of Texas at Austin, there can be a “dark side” to weight loss, if both partners are not on board with enacting healthy changes.

 

Lead author Dr Lynsey Romo, an assistant professor of communication at NC State, said that people need to be aware that weight loss can change a relationship for better or worse, and that communication plays an important role in maintaining a healthy relationship.

 

For the study, researchers surveyed 21 couples -- 42 adults -- from across the country.

 

One partner in each couple lost 30 or more pounds in less than two years, with an average weight loss of about 60 pounds.

 

The questionnaires asked each member of the couple about the impact of the weight loss on their relationship.

 

The researchers found that, after weight loss, the couples’ communication generally changed for the good. The partner who lost weight was more likely to talk about healthy behaviours and inspire his/her partner to maintain or enact a healthy lifestyle. Couples in which both partners were receptive to these healthy changes reported more positive interactions and increased physical and emotional intimacy.

 

However, in some cases, partners who lost weight nagged their significant other to follow their lead, which caused tension in the relationship.

 

Other partners who hadn’t lost weight reported feeling threatened and insecure by their partner’s weight loss.

 

The paper has been published in the journal Health Communication.

 

What women gauge about men from their shoes

Women can find a lot of things just by looking at a man’s shoes, a survey has revealed.

 

A pair of loafers tells women that a man is image conscious. When they see these foot wear they know that it is possible that the man will have a better skin-care routine than them.

 

And if a person wears them with cuffed trousers they know that they could spend more time in front of the mirror than they do. If men wear them with cuffed trousers with no socks then they know that the men are batting for the other team, stuff.com reported.

 

If a person wears joggers the women think that he is a very, very funny person.

 

Men wearing brogues are traditional, dependable and reliable. Brogues say father, husband, and a life-long friend.

 

But the wearer can also potentially be a little dull. Men who wear logo shoes mostly are trying to prove a point.

 

If a man wears work boots, it tells the women that he has a traditional personality, is from a traditional family that is traditionally comforting. The work boots could also mean that the man has a country property.

 

Men who wear hiking boots, are people who really want to be on a mountain, as Hiker boots says that the person is an adventurer and wanderer.

 

11 per cent drivers have had sex in their cars

A new survey has found that 11 per cent of drivers have had sex while driving.

 

The new online survey from the US has revealed some interesting trends on how much “living” goes on in people’s cars -- whether it be eating, using their phone or having sex, the Age reported.

 

The Scout GPS survey, which involved 2034 participants, found that 11 per cent of drivers admitted to having sex while driving.

 

Men were three times more likely to admit to participating in sexual activity than women (17 per cent and 5 per cent respectively), and were also overrepresented when it came to flirting with another driver (twice as likely).

 

Forget easy-to-handle hamburgers while behind the wheel -- 13 per cent of people admitted to eating something with a utensil while driving.

 

The survey also revealed some intriguing figures on what people would do if no one was watching.

 

Nine per cent of respondents said they’d drive naked, 15 per cent said they would have sex, 30 per cent said they would pick their noses and 54 per cent admitted they would sing out loud.

 

The study revealed some more concerning trends about mobile phone use, with 19 per cent of participants admitting they had checked social media, email, or played games whilst driving, and 60 per cent confirmed they had used a phone in some capacity.

 

How texting could disconnect couples

A new study suggests that when it comes to serious conversations, disagreements or apologies, couples shouldn’t let their thumbs do the talking.

 

Brigham Young University researchers Lori Schade and Jonathan Sandberg studied 276 young adults around the country and found that being constantly connected through technology can create some disconnects in committed relationships.

 

For women, using text messages to apologise, work out differences or make decisions is associated with lower relationship quality.

 

For men, too frequent texting is associated with lower relationship quality.

 

“Technology is more important to relationship formation than it was previously,” Schade, who earned her PhD from BYU in August, said.

 

“The way couples text is having an effect on the relationship as well,” the researcher said.

 

The study participants weren’t just casually dating -- 38 per cent said they were in a serious relationship, 46 per cent were engaged and 16 per cent were married.

 

Each participant completed an extensive relationship assessment that included questions about their use of technology in the relationship.

 

About 82 per cent of them traded text messages with their partner multiple times a day. And it’s not always “I

 

Many of the couples used texting for stuff scholars call “relationship maintenance,” or the kind of conversations that help couples get on the same page.

 

Ordinarily having these conversations is a good thing, but texting can get in the way and makes things worse.

 

“Reaction to disappointment and reality testing occurs more quickly face to face,” Sandberg said.

 

“There is a narrowness with texting and you don’t get to see the breadth of a person that you need to see,” he added.

 

For men, more texting doesn’t necessarily mean a better relationship. And they don’t just get tired of receiving texts; their relationship satisfaction is also lower when they send a lot of texts themselves.

 

The study is published in the Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy.

 

 

 

Source: What really turns women on

Self Confidence

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”

― Mahatma Gandhi

 

Fear exists at the heart of every unfulfilled dream. If there is something in our life that we want, we are going to have to confront some fears in order to get it. Having confidence in our ability to achieve goals, to move forward in the face of fear, and to accomplish our desires, is critical if we are going to live a life that is personally fulfilling and meaningful. Not everyone is born with natural confidence. Some people struggle, and for many people, difficult circumstances in their own lives can really impact their self confidence.

Three Trees

Once upon a mountain top, three little trees stood and dreamed of what they wanted to become when they grew up.

 

The first little tree looked up at the stars and said: "I want to hold treasure. I want to be covered with gold and filled with precious stones. I'll be the most beautiful treasure chest in the world!"

 

The second little tree looked out at the small stream trickling by on its way to the ocean. "I want to be traveling mighty waters and carrying powerful kings. I'll be the strongest ship in the world!"

 

The third little tree looked down into the valley below where busy men and women worked in a busy town. "I don't want to leave the mountain top at all. I want to grow so tall that when people stop to look at me, they'll raise their eyes to heaven and think of God. I will be the tallest tree in the world."

 

Years passed and the little trees grew tall. One day three woodcutters climbed the mountain. The first woodcutter looked at the first tree and said, "This tree is beautiful. It is perfect for me."

 

With a swoop of his shining ax, the first tree fell. "Now I shall be made into a beautiful chest, I shall hold wonderful treasure!" the first tree said.

 

The second woodcutter looked at the second tree and said, "This tree is strong. It is perfect for me." With a swoop of his shining ax, the second tree fell. "Now I shall sail mighty waters!" thought the second tree. "I shall be a strong ship for mighty kings!"

 

The third tree felt her heart sink when the last woodcutter looked her way. She stood straight and tall and pointed bravely to heaven. But the woodcutter never even looked up. "Any kind of tree will do for me." He muttered. With a swoop of his shining ax the third tree fell.

 

The first tree rejoiced when the woodcutter brought her to a carpenter's shop. But the carpenter fashioned the tree into a feed box for animals. The once beautiful tree was not covered with gold, nor with treasure. She was coated with sawdust and filled with hay for hungry farm animals.

 

The second tree smiled when the woodcutter took her to a shipyard, but no mighty ship was made that day. Instead, the once strong tree was hammered and sawed into a simple fishing boat. She was too small and too weak to sail to an ocean, or even a river. Instead she was taken to a little lake.

 

The third tree was confused when the woodcutter cut her into strong beams and left her in a lumberyard. "What happened?" The once tall tree wondered. "All I ever wanted was to stay on the mountain top and point to God..."

 

Many, many days and nights passed. The three trees nearly forgot their dreams. But one night, golden starlight poured over the first tree as a young woman placed her newborn baby in the feed box. "I wish I could make a cradle for him," her husband whispered. The mother squeezed his hand and smiled as the starlight shone on the smooth and the sturdy wood. "This manger is beautiful," she said. And suddenly the first tree knew he was holding the greatest treasure in the world.

 

One evening a tired traveler and his friends crowded into the old fishing boat. The traveler fell asleep as the second tree quietly sailed out into the lake. Soon a thundering and thrashing storm arose. The little tree shuddered. She knew she did not have the strength to carry so many passengers safely through the wind and the rain. The tired man awakened. He stood up, stretched out his hand and said, "Peace." The storm stopped as quickly as it had begun. And suddenly the second tree knew he was carrying the King of heaven and earth.

 

One Friday morning, the third tree was startled when her beams were yanked from the forgotten woodpile. She flinched as she was carried through an angry jeering crowd. She shuddered when soldiers nailed a man's hands to her. She felt ugly and harsh and cruel. But on Sunday morning, when the sun rose and the earth trembled with joy beneath her, the third tree knew that God's love had changed everything. It had made the third tree strong. And every time people thought of the third tree, they would think of God.

 

That was better than being the tallest tree in the world.

 

So the next time you feel down because you didn't get what you want, just sit tight and be happy because God is thinking of something better to give you.

Ideal Exercise for Everyone - Walking

Excuses…Excuses…Excuses

 

The ideal exercise for everyone is walking, for a longer, healthier life.

 

1.    The safest and best form of exercise.

 

2.    Ideal for developing long term cardiovascular fitness and improving respiratory efficiency.

 

3.    The perfect activity for weight loss and burning away fat and unwanted calories.

 

4.    Ideal for conditioning the hips, thighs and stomach muscles.

 

5.    The ideal way to beat the stress – positive approach for a healthy body and mind.

 

6.    Appropriate for young and old.

 

7.    Walking is cheap, flexible in time, speed and location to suit any age.

 

Exercise! – that sounds like hard work for me.

It seems that many people do think that exercise is too much like hard work. They may even think of it as an X-rated activity – xercise! – Something best to be avoided. This is true for many people who start out on strenuous exercise programs, injure themselves and give it all up, but if you start out with a moderate program like brisk fitness walking and build up gradually, then you will enjoy it and you won’t want to give up.

 

Exercise! – I haven’t got the time. I am too busy.

Just 20 to 30 minutes fitness walking three to four times a week will give you all the long-term fitness and cardiovascular benefits that you need, and help you keep slim. Once you start to feel the benefits, and walking becomes a regular habit, you will want to find the time to get out. Try getting up earlier on the morning to walk, walk during lunch times; walk in tour work breaks instead of drinking coffee or smoking; walk in the evening instead of settling down in a chair in front of television.

 

Exercise! – I need relaxation, not exercise.

Fitness walking is best form of relaxation around. It relieves stress by helping you to get away from telephones and all the noise and distractions of life, and it helps you to take your mind off your problems and rediscover an inner peace. After a session of brisk fitness walking you will feel calm and relaxed and you will want to find time regularly to get out and recapture this feeling. Indeed, studies have shown exercise such as this can lift depression and help you to sleep better.

 

Exercise – I’d be embarrassed.

We have all seen the ardent jogger pounding his way along the pavements, puffing and panting as though his life depended on it; and we have all seen the new jogger out with a shiny new shell-suit and training shoes – and we have thought ‘rather you than me.’ So why not try fitness walking? All you need is a pair of comfortable walking shoes and off you go. There is no need to be embarrassed – you are going to be walking a little faster than other people, but you will look and feel better doing it. And, in the stakes of fitness and health, you will be leaving far behind. Remember fitness walking is not a sport – it’s an enjoyable exercise.

 

Exercise! – I’m too old for it.

You are never too old to start exercising. Provided you take into account any diagnosed medical problems and consult with your doctor first, then you can start out on a program of fitness walking and build up gradually to an aerobic conditioning program that will benefit you for the rest of your life.

 

Exercise! – I am too fat. I would rather diet.

You may not realise it, but you will benefit more from a regular program of exercise like fitness walking, together with low-fat high-fibre nutritious diet, than you will from dieting alone. Fitness walking will help you slim and stay slim by burning up the calories. If you burn more calories than you eat, your body will begin to use its own energy stores and fat will start disappear.

 

Exercise – That sounds boring.

It’s not that we don’t try to exercise – we do. We just give up too soon because we often forget that there are ways to make exercise fun. Studies show that one out of every two people who start an exercise program drop out within the first six months and half of those quit during the first week. This is where fitness walking scores. Fitness walking is fun. After a short time, you will feel great; have increased energy, improved concentration and heightened sense of well-being.