Wednesday, October 31, 2012

10 things you should give up to be happy

Just as there things you do to attain happiness, there are as many you must give up. Here's a quick list of ten such things:

It is perhaps easier to start doing something new than it is to give something up and yet unlearning something old is very much a part of learning something new. Not very long ago we told you about the simple tasks that can make you feel great in 30 minutes.

Over the next few pages, we've listed bunch of things you should consider giving up (not necessarily over the next 30 minutes) so you feel happy!

1. Give up smoking
Apart from all the health hazards that you probably know of already, smoking according to a 2010 study makes you dumb. You read it right -- people who smoke tend to have lower IQs than their non-smoking peers, the research says.

Sure, all of us thought smoking was the thing to do back in college and university but let's face it smokers are so not happening any more. They stink all the time and probably can't climb more than a couple of flights of stairs.

Smoking is passe and it probably stopped being cool in the last century. So really there aren't a lot of reasons why you should be smoking to begin with!

2. Give up binge drinking every single weekend
Many of us have had that one time when we've passed out in the hallway or have had so much to drink that we have no recollection of how we landed home the previous night. And sure, it almost always makes for a great story -- heck it even makes for a damn good movie -- but again what would you think of your roomie returning home every other weekend, throwing up and passing out every single time?

Sure, binge drinking may seem like fun occasionally but think of it, do you really need us to tell you how much it can set you back financially, mentally and physically? Besides, there most certainly are far better places to hang out on weekends than dingy bars and loud pubs, aren't there?

3. Give up waking up late on holidays all-the-time
Here's the thing about weekends and holidays -- they're all yours to spend. You don't necessarily have to report in to work or check emails, which means you can pretty much do what your little heart desires -- head out for a leisurely brunch with your partner or watch the movie you've been meaning to catch up or go for a long swim that you've wanted to go for the whole week but couldn't.

If you're one of those lucky ones who have a two-day weekend, you could head out to the nearest beach or hill station for a holiday.

So why on earth would you want to s-l-e-e-p for f-i-f-t-e-e-n hours each day on a weekend when you could do all of this (and perhaps more) before you get back into the grind of the next week?

Weekends are your time; make the most of it -- not by sleeping but rather by doing something exciting, something you could look back on and say 'Hey, that was a good weekend'. So do something exciting this weekend if only to update your Facebook profile photo. No really!

4. Give up procrastinating
Of all the things in the list so far and those to follow, this one is arguably the most difficult to give up. Why, after all, would you want to do something you can put away for tomorrow right away?

Writing out a cheque, paying a bill, doing the laundry, changing the linen -- the list of little things we procrastinate over is endless. And then comes the day when you have absolutely no option but to do a-l-l of those in one single day -- invariably on your one precious day off.

The thing about procrastinating is that it's the little things that usually lead to larger ones -- lost opportunities at work, ill health or the prospect of pushing the limits of your partner's patience by avoiding the tasks set out for you at home.

Like everything else in this list you don't need to be told why you should quit procrastinating, except that for your own good you quite simply must.

5. Give up criticising
It's the one thing everyone loves to do probably because a) it's easy and b) few things make you feel as good as pointing out someone's mistakes (even if s/he's your best friend). But when you really think of it, where does criticising get you anyway.

If at all, it breeds negativity one that is most likely to affect you than the person you're speaking against.

No one loves someone who criticises constantly and finds flaws with everything anyone does.

Stop being bothered by the flaws of others; if they're those who matter to you bring it up once or twice and let it go after that. Learn to live with the flaws of people around you; chances are they're doing the same with you.

6. Give up making excuses
Much like criticising, making excuses is easy, which makes it the most tempting thing to do, right? And yet in very many ways it saddles you with baggage you could well do without -- your career heads nowhere, that advanced degree remains unfinished and the weight you always wanted to lose stays on (or worse, adds up).

So really, throw away those excuses you've been making up and buckle up because excuses get you nowhere. Pull up your socks, take a call on your career, complete the degree you've been dying to get and hit the gym to lose those pounds.

Think of it, how difficult can it be after all?

7. Give up trying to be someone you are not
The question you really must ask yourself first is what is it that makes you unique? It is easy to lose track of who we and what we want to be in the media-driven world that we live in.

Get a grip, stop comparing yourself with others and living up to what they believe is right. Come to terms with the fact that on some days you're the pigeon and on other days, the statue. Be honest to yourself and don't let the ghosts of your past determine who you are or will be in the future.

8. Give up the need for control
Learn to let things go and let people be. You cannot control the actions of people around you -- be it your children, your spouse or your other loved ones. They will act according to their beliefs and reasons because that is what human beings are supposed to do. Stop being a control freak and learn to let people be. Chances are you'll find your peace faster and more easily.

9. Give up brooding over failures
This is an extension of the last one. Everyone fails at some point (believe us, it's true) and it's only fair that you stop being tough on yourself and kick yourself for a mistake you made. Sure, it is essential to ponder over the mistakes one makes so as to learn from them but brooding over your failures can get you nowhere. So stop. And move on.

10. Give up resisting change
Whether we like it or not change is the only constant in our lives. So stop trying to fight it and rather choose to embrace it willingly. Remember people change, situations change and so must you. And even as you must not change so much that you forget who you are, remember that more you try to resist change the more bitter you will find yourself becoming.


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