By David Ning |
U.S.News & World Report LP
Many people are faced with the need to
help their parents while still tending to their own retirement needs. It can be
challenging to share resources with more people, and a plan is essential to
avoid conflicts. Here are seven important points to consider when helping out
your parents financially:
Figure
out how you will actually afford everything. Most people are quick to offer
financial support without thinking it though, which often results in unneeded
stress and arguments when the finances don't quite work out. It's important to
develop a financial plan right from the beginning to clearly communicate what
is possible. Your plan should cover you, your family and your parent's needs as
well as possible. Don't forget future needs either. It's easy to allow
immediate needs to consume all your resources because they seem so urgent, but
that's a recipe for disaster down the road. You need to take care of your
future self too.
Talk
about the new arrangement with all the people involved. It's
important to sit down and talk about the plan. Don't forget to invite your
siblings to the discussion to avoid confusion and duplicate efforts. Perhaps
your siblings are already helping in some way, or might be willing to start
helping out once they understand the situation. You'll never know unless
someone actually talks about it.
Your
parents might need more than financial help. Another reason to sit down
with your parents is to fully understand what they actually need. Money
concerns are obvious, but many parents can also benefit from the emotional
support that only their children can provide. In many cases, the care you can
offer is much more important to them than any checks you can send their way.
Consider
having your parents move in with you. It's almost taboo in our society, but
living with your parents once you are grown and have your own family is
actually quite common in many different cultures around the world. Yes, more
people within close proximity often complicates even the tiniest issues, but it
could also create a ton of joy. While there will be some extra liabilities,
your parents can likely help out in many different ways just by being around
the house. Plus, one less living arrangement to pay for can free up quite a bit
of money. It could be a win-win.
Help
them maximize their benefits. Medicare, Medicaid and Social
Security are all programs that can make the difference between worrying and not
worrying about meeting basic needs. Chances are very high that your parents
aren't maximizing their benefits from these programs. Take time to study the
details so you can help them reap the most rewards, and you will benefit too by
being able to plan more efficiently for your own retirement.
Spend
more valuable time with them, and encourage them to have a comfortable life. Though money
matters usually spark these types of discussions, continue the conversation by
suggesting a more fulfilling life. Instead of sending a check for food every
month, consider inviting them over for dinner every few days. Instead of gifting
them cash for entertainment, consider taking a walk in the park. There are
countless ways to be happy without spending a ton of money. Help your parents
find joy in life.
Cherish
the time you have with them. You may dread hearing your parent's
complaints and try to avoid seeing them, but you will one day look back and
miss the time you get to spend with your folks. You can always make more money,
but you will never have more time.
Helping your aging parents can
actually be a blessing in disguise, because a loving family can provide much
more than any monetary amount can. So go ahead, ask your parents to see how you
can help, even if they aren't seeking help. You may even become a happier
person in the process.
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