Thursday, November 28, 2013

Humour

God said, 'Adam, I Want you to do Something for Me.'
 
Adam said, 'Gladly, Lord, what do You Want me to do?'
 
God said, 'Go down Into that valley.'
 
Adam said, 'What's a Valley?'
 
God explained it to Him. Then God said, 'Cross the river.'
 
Adam said, 'What's a River?'
 
God explained that To him, and then said, 'Go over to the hill....'
 
 Adam said, 'What is a Hill?'
 
So, God explained to Adam what a hill was.
 
He told Adam, 'On The other side of the Hill you will find a Cave.'
 
Adam said, 'What's a Cave?'
 
After God explained,
He said, 'In the cave You will find a woman.'
 
Adam said, 'What's a Woman?'
 
So God explained That to him, too.
 
Then, God said, 'I Want you to Reproduce.'
 
Adam said, 'How do I do that?'
 
God first said (under His breath), 'Geez.....'
 
And then, just like Everything else, God Explained that to Adam, as well.
 
So, Adam goes down Into the valley,
 
Across the river, and Over the hill, into the Cave, and finds the Woman.
 
Then, in about five Minutes, he was back.
 
God, His patience Wearing thin, said
 Angrily, 'What is it Now?'
 
And Adam said....
 
*
 
(YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE THIS!!!!!!)
 
*
 
*
 
'What's a headache?'
 ..................................................................................................................................
 
A Husband and Wife, Both were very happy over the twelve pound baby boy that was born to them. Mr. Brown who could not conceal his delight, called up the editor of a famous newspaper and reported that he became the proud owner of a twelve pound nugget of gold.
 
The editor upon hearing the seemingly extraordinary news was rather hesitant to accept it at its face value. So he sent his star reporter to interview Mr. Brown.
 
When the reporter came, Mr Brown was away and his wife was alone at home. The following interesting conversation took place between the reporter and Mrs. Brown
 
Reporter : Does Mr. Brown Live here?
Mrs. Brown : Oh! Yes.
 
Reporter : Is he in?
Mrs. Brown : Why no, he went somewhere.
 
Reporter : Is it true that he owns a twelve pound nugget of gold?
Mrs. Brown : (Seeing the joke) Yes, indeed.
 
Reporter : Can I see the place where he found it?
Mrs. Brown : I am afraid, not because Mr. Brown objects in as much as it is strictly private.
 
Reporter : Is the place far?
Mrs. Brown : No, it is quite near and convenient.
 
Reporter : How many years has Mr. Brown been digging the hole?
Mrs. Brown : Just for about ten months.
 
Reporter : Is the hole deep?
Mrs. Brown : Quite so...
 
Reporter : Has Mr. Brown reached the bottom of it?
Mrs. Brown : Not yet, but he is coming near...
 
Reporter : At about what time does Mr. Brown starts digging?
Mrs. Brown : Oh, he does his digging mostly at night.
 
Reporter : Does he work hard on it?
Mrs. Brown : You bet...........and how he perspires.
 
Reporter : Is Mr. Brown the first to dig?
Mrs. Brown : He thought he was...
 
Reporter : How do you know there was someone ahead of him?
Mrs. Brown : I am in a good position to say so, because I own the place.
 
Reporter : Oh, I see, but you sold the place to Mr. Brown?
Mrs. Brown : No, but for the present, he has the legal title to the site, with my consent.
 
Reporter : Has Mr. Brown any helper when he works on the claim?
Mrs. Brown : Yes, I work under him..
 
Reporter : When do you think Mr. Brown will sell the place?
Mrs. Brown : I think not because he enjoys working on it.
 
Reporter : Can I see the twelve pound nugget of gold?
Mrs. Brown : Yes, certainly (and she showed him the twelve pound baby boy).
 
P.S.: The reporter had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
 

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