Tuesday, June 19, 2012

True Statements


·         Behind every successful man, there is a great woman and behind every great woman, there is a smart guy staring at her butt.

·         If you don't believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut.

·         Opinion is like an ass hole, everyone has one.

·         A mistress lies between a mister and a mattress.

·         Chess players mate better.

·         Excuses are like asses: everyone has em and they all stink.

·         Squirrel who runs up woman's leg do not find nuts.

·         If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you between F and CK.

·         Sex is the price women have to pay for marriage. Marriage is the price men have to pay for sex.

·         Impotence: Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings".

·         If you think sex is a pain in the ass, you're doing it wrong.

·         There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - don't and stop, unless they are used together.

·         The difference between a husband and a lover is the difference between day and night.

·         I love you in blue. I love you in red but most of all. I love you in bed.

·         Prostitution is a hole sale business.

·         A tight dress is like a barbed fence. It protects the premises without restricting the view.

·         It is good for woman to meet man in park, but better for man to park meat in woman.

·         What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick.

·         Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last.

·         Good sex can correct poor posture, or at least make it stand up straight.

·         I'm not attracted by a girl's mind ... But by what she doesn't mind.

·         Guns don't kill people... Husbands who come home early kill people.

·         Gettin' married is like getting into a bath tub. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.

·         Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy!

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